In case you were under the impression that people such as myself, who play the role of cheerleaders for others, never fall into the traps of their own mind; you are wrong. Today I woke up with one of those “What am I doing?” feelings, lost and confused, putting my head down and curling into a corner like a puppy dog with its tail between its hind legs. Hoping to have my feelings unnoticed, I turned my body over in bed opposite of my husband in an attempt to disguise my mood. In all of nature’s wisdom, my husband picked up on it, as he sensed the electromagnetic field carried out from my vibration. Yes, it takes a loving man to be that in tune with his life partner and develop a keen perception.
My husband offered some kind words to help shift me away from the wall of my personal resistance and back into the creative flow of my true nature. As always, he softly left the scene leaving only the trace of his enduring love. The subtlety of that love was enough to get me out of bed and rushing to a morning appointment. I threw myself together giving little attention to my appearance as my mind had me believing I was not as important as getting to my destination on time.
I drove off in the direction of my appointment with labored breath as I continued to wallow in my self-pity. As I approached the light of the underpass beneath the freeway, I glanced over to my right and saw a young woman wearing a bright pink jacket, walking strangely inches from the passing cars. From afar, I could see here body’s motion indicating either someone under the influence of drug and alcohol, or someone who is physically impaired. I was concerned seeing her careless regard for the vehicles moving past her as she crossed the intersection. In spite of my time constraint, I turned the car around and headed back to find her.
As I approached her, I was heartbroken as other drivers had little awareness and consideration to fact that they were spraying her with the street water accumulated from the recent rain. I watched her frail body steadily stay on track as if on a mission. I slowed down and got close enough not to startle or frighten her, then rolled down the passenger window.
“Honey do you need some help?” I shouted from the driver’s side
“Can you take me to my doctor’s appointment, I missed my bus?”
My heart became mush, “Yes get in. Where is your doctor located?”
“Keep driving is right up here on the right”. She directed me to the facility and I asked
“What time was your appointment?”
“11:00 am, I’m good.” As she looked at the time on my car’s console.
“How long will it last?” I asked. “I have somewhere to be but I’ll pick you back up and give you a ride home if you promise to wait for me. My name is Denise what is yours? “
“Amanda”, she responded out of the side of her mouth as she struggled with the motion of her head and constant body movement produced by what I could assess as being cerebral palsy.
“Okay then Amanda, I’ll be back for you in one hour and I’ll drive you home”.
The moment she closed the car door, it was like a led balloon dropping over my head. I could not contain my tears as my emotions came face to face with the realization in this delicate life offering. Here was a woman who in spite of her physical limitations, walked who knows what distance in the rain to get to her neurologist in order to better her condition. While I, on the other hand, drowned in my own made up limitations. Once again, nature’s wisdom came out to meet me and usher me back into the land of “You can do it”. I marvel at how intuitively the universe responds to our queries and comes out to meet us right where we are, no matter where we are. All we have to do is open our eyes, our heart, look around and notice.
I returned to the neurologist office promptly within one hour, but Amanda was not in sight. I asked the receptionist if she was still in session. The receptionist looked at me funny and said:
“Amanda…you mean Samantha?”
“Yes”, I responded “that could be more accurate”.
“Ah! I saw her go out the door about 10 minute ago”.
I then looked for her all over the nearby grounds, and did not see her bright pink jacket stand out. I felt sad that she would have to make the journey back home on foot, but knew deep inside she would be all right.
As comedian Bill Engvall would say, “here’s your sign”, Samantha was placed on my path to remind me that I’m never alone and my most inner thoughts are always heard. Thank you Samantha for the gift of your presence.